A Roman Stoic Philosopher (Epictetus – who lived around 100 A.D.), is credited with a thought used by psychiatrists, psychologists, in training programs, and throughout the Corporate world – “It is not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.”  While that statement sounds like it is relatively clear and easy to understand, it is more complex than first thought and often difficult to implement than might appear at first glance.

 

No matter what we do or say, things we see as being either “good” or “bad” happen in our lives. Generally, good things are those you feel you had some control over and that had a positive impact on your life. Good things are easy to manage as you typically reap great rewards with minimal efforts. “Bad” things are usually those occurrences, results, or situations over which you have little or no control, are perceived as being a threat to you, or that will have a negative impact on you and those around you. Bad things tend to make us feel that we have little control of a situation and minimal “say” in creating an acceptable outcome. Psychologists often say there are no good things or bad things – that how a person reacts to a situation makes it seem either good or bad. While an individual does not necessarily have control over the “thing” that “happens” to them, once the realization that his or her actions to a set of circumstances allows them to control the outcome or the response – that some “unnamed outside influence” is not in control of their reality – helps them to accept the “good” in most situations rather than surrendering to the “bad.” A goal without a plan, however, is just a dream – and transforming dreams into reality can most easily be accomplished if a process is established that has specific steps of checks and balances which can be followed consistently to put each “thing” that happens into perspective. An effective process that can be used as a resource to establish communications, assign activities, monitor progress, and produce results when several people are reacting to a situation, however, must contain several key factors that – when followed - will allow us to initiate actions quickly and consistently:

 

1.     Stop – Rather than blindly reacting to a situation, take a minute to consider potential actions, their ramifications, other issues that might arise which could be more detrimental than what you are trying to resolve. Thinking about alternative courses which could be taken to resolve a situation creates the opportunity for us to put things into perspective rather than allowing them to remain imagined potential disasters over which we have little control.

2.     Analyze - Assess the situation to determine the root cause of the problem (focusing on the ISSUE rather than symptoms or results), establish whether it is a real or a perceived problem, and identify what the outcomes might be (both good and bad) if NOTHING were done. Think about who might be able to help clarify the situation, who has the ability to change or alter things that might need to be addressed. Prioritize the issue so as to apply the appropriate sense of urgency to its resolution.

3.     Plan – After identifying the real issue, plan a course of action. Sometimes, the best course of action is to choose to INTENTIONALLY do nothing except be aware that the “thing’ may happen again (it is rarely a good course of action to UNINTENTIONALLY do nothing). An individual may have realized through the Stop and Analize activities that it is a good thing (or something that has not yet shown itself to be “bad”) and should be left alone. Recognize that there are situations where an individual has no control over either the situation or the outcome – that realization being an action in and of itself. If a situation must be addressed and can be altered, however, planning on how to best “attack” the problem, who to involve, how to monitor progress, and establishing a timeline as to its resolution are invaluable in initiating change.

4.     Implement – After determining what actions, if any, should be implemented, put the plan into place to help manage any similar situations that may happen in the future. The objective of taking action to resolve real issues is to prevent or minimize future reoccurrences. The decision we make to either allow ourselves to be overcome by our situations (often a fear of failure or recognition that we do not possess the resources to effectively act) or control their impact on us and our Organization (by identifying what is wrong, what can be done, and making sure that SOMETHING happens) become the difference between making life happen as we wish or letting life “happen” to us without any sense of control.

 

Life happens, and there is nothing that can be done to change that reality. Many times, because of the positive nature of life events, we may want to do nothing but enjoy the event. Often, however, life’s events are not (or not perceived to be) positive. By having a process (or plan) in place, these events can be placed in the proper perspective and redirected towards a positive outcome, fulfilling the statement thought that there are no good things or bad things, just things and how we react to them. Depending on how a person reacts to a thing makes it good or bad.

 

TEA has the resources and processes to help individuals and employees take control of life’s events and lower stress while increasing productivity. Please contact me ([email protected]) or call Brian (616-698-1167) to learn more.